Tuesday, November 24, 2015

OkCupid: Taking stock

Today marks 7 weeks since I started anew with OkCupid.

I have had conversations with 68 guys, most of which didn't last past a few exchanges before petering out. Out of those, I'm still in either sporadic or regular contact with 16, regretfully turned away 3, and blocked 5 for being dodgy. When I say 'dodgy', I mean asking me if I know how to give a blowjob; telling me he's very well-endowed; repeatedly asking me to come over to his condo so we could meet, right NOW; trying to persuade me that having sex is part of living life to the fullest, when I'd told him it was off the table; and not telling me he was married until we had sat down in a restaurant and ordered food.

I met up with 6, out of which one was the married guy, one fizzled out after meeting (i.e. no further contact later), one told me I win the "best buddies" award (got friendzoned, lol!), one asked for a second, then third date, one I ended up regretfully declining, and one... well, we'll see. I'm meeting him tomorrow.

28 guys didn't reply my initiating email.

19 moved off the OkC app to WhatsApp, including the 5 who ended up getting blocked and two of the three who were regretfully turned away. Of the rest, some have fizzled out, some are in sporadic contact, and a few in regular contact.

I am suffering from OkC fatigue. So much repeated small talk and doing the self-reveal over and over again is a bit draining. My inner introvert is screaming, but I admit I always get a thrill when I see messages coming in. I'm excited to read what a guy has to say, especially if he's replying to a message I sent. It's fun. But I don't think I can keep up this level of intensity for long.

I have discovered that chemistry is very real, and a couple either has it, or doesn't have it. I've also, however, discovered that there are different kinds of chemistry, such as a "best buddies" one. He and I get on like a house on fire, but there isn't a smidgen of romantic feeling in it. There's someone else I have chemistry with, the only guy who asked me out more than once, and that's exciting... we're continuing to get to know each other, enjoying the process.

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